Anil Dash
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Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetHappy anniversary. Very BEAUTIFUL post, btw!!
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetHappy Aniversary Mr. Dash ( belated )
I cant say anything about ur writing, but the World.
Vinod
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetI really thank you for writing this up. I may not be currently married, but I am in a relationship with my boyfriend that is now going on four years. A friend had suggested that we start dating, and she made the perfect match.
I had only been in one other "relationship" before him. The relationship was with a girl and was 6 years of hell that I couldn't get away from. Even after four years, my boyfriend is fixing the old wounds that were left from that girl. After even dating for a year, he had explained that he was sort of dating one of his male friends before moving from Ontario to Manitoba, and meeting me.
Both he and I support gay marriage since we are both bisexual and are proud of it. Even one of our friends (Someone who follows the way of Christianity very closely) supports us and doesn't mind the idea of gay marriage.
I really thank you again for proving that marriage isn't a bad thing like so many try to portray it as. both my parents and my boyfriend's parents were high school sweethearts (for my parents, it was slightly younger) and both sets of our parents have been married for over 25 years. I'm really hoping that sometime soon, my boyfriend pops the question, then the gamer/anime wedding can be planned.
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetHappy anniversary.
I'm not married (and I don't know if ever I'll marry). I did enjoy your writings. Will visit you again next time.
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetWow. Anil, once again, you say something I could have written -- or did write, but not as well.
http://www.webfoot.com/blog/2008/10/30/californians-please-vote-no-on-prop-8/I am a straight woman who loves being married (for many of the same the reasons you mentioned), and it is absolutely true -- not a little bit -- that I would not have gotten married if it had not been for the good example of a male couple.
I want to meet you the next time you're in Vancouver, BC. :-)
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetAs my dear mother always used to say, "You don't need to swear to be funny. But it fuckin' well doesn't hurt. Fuck."
Ok, she never said that, but HAD the Big B ever dropped the F-bomb on the S Street, I can tell you right now that my whole world view would have been a hella lot less skewed that it is already.
It's a Big Bird, man. A TALKING big bird. Like, 7 feet tall. And Solicitor General GGG is worried that the gigantic talking yellow bird swearing is the problem? Trust me: between Big B, the very very angry Oscar living in the garbage can, the cookie obsessed monster, the clearly in the closet Bert and Ernie, and (for the younger generation) the slightly simple and annoyingly ticklish Elmo, Sesame Street has a whole lot to answer for already.
It did teach me everything I know about music though. Damned fine funky pinball counting classic, anyone?
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=HgocE-JfWFI---------------
http://thisisthenoshow.blogspot.com/
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetThe media doesn't "lack a spine" ... the media wants to sell papers, and pandering to the lower instincts is no longer relegated to the tabloids. The interwebs are the tabloids, and the media are happy to follow suit.
Follow the money — the answer is usually there.
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetGreat post! Luckily, I enjoy all of those things in my long-term relationship ... it's good to be reminded of all of the wonderful things I enjoy, some of which can be easy to take for granted.
I'm not sure if anything would change if/when my girlfriend and I get married ... but I'm sure it'll happen. I'm not sure I want to get married before same-sex couples in my state can do the same, however. We're a heterosexual couple, but ... it just wouldn't seem fair.
I think I'll get married when my gay friends can. Until then ... who knows? Maybe we'll get a civil union ... are heterosexual couples allows to get civil unions, or is that just reserved for "those crazy gays"?
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetThanks Anil and Congratulations.
I've been married legally and illegally now for 18 years. It's great and it's being challenged. Thanks for the vote of confidence on a day when I'm not so sure how it will end up.
Jeff Tidwell
San Francisco
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetQuite the expert. A mindreader and a total prophet. Why don't you just read everyone's mail for us and decide who should lead us. This is total and complete arrogance and another example of liberal insanity at its best. The Bush haters have lost their bearing and compass. Examining ones friends and allies is certainly a view into someones thoughts and values. Is it not? Let me try to make it simple from an ignorant clinging midwesterner to the ultra left wing loonies: If it looks like a duck....
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetFantastic post Anil. I must say that even though I'm not married, I was nodding at all the items on your list. If you're in a relationship and/or you live together then the majority if not all of your list items still apply. Just swap the words 'wife' for 'girlfriend' and bob's your uncle mate.
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | Tweet"...seeing a real, honest, unconventional-but-honest marriage inspired my wife and I to commit to one another..."
Oops, you meant to write "inspired my wife and me," right?
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetYour blog is great! We've linked to it with our Celebrate The Art of Marriage blog today on caffection.blogspot.com. If you know of other Caffected couples, tell them to pass on the good news of being in a fully committed, healthy relationship!
Caffectionately yours,
Mariah & Byron Edgington
Columbus OH
caffection.com
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | Tweetnice.
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetVery insightful look at the use of language, especially the focus on how Palin is employing language in subtle ways. Code switching is one name for it. Dog Whistle politics is another.
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetBeautiful post, Anil. I've been reading your blog since we met at IBM...and this post really touched me. I'm in a serious relationship with the girl who is "the one" -- it's great to hear from a guy on the other side of popping the question say how happy he is so eloquently. Happy anniversary and happy Halloween too. Cheers!
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetHappy Anniversary!
Next year my wife and I will have been married 30 years - they have been more wonderful than not but it is still a work in progress. I am proud to say I'm married to my best friend and, since it sounds like you are of a like mind, I wanted to point you to a website that two friends of mine are running - its http://caffection.com/ - and it is a site that celebrates marriage - for ALL couples. So again, many blessings for you and yours and, if you like the site please spread the word. Your support would certainly help and I think that site will help all of those who want to see love recognized and celebrated for all people.
Cheers
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetHappy anniversary! And great post Anil. You said several things that I've often wanted to say about marriage. It's the best, and I feel fortunate for it. The best thing in my life, by far. The key, I think, to a great marriage is right there in your first point: be best friends.
~~~~~~~Yesterday, immediately after voting for Barack Obama at San Francisco City Hall, I walked upstairs and watched a just-married couple pose for pictures at various points around the rotunda. They were giddy and euphoric; obviously thrilled at the prospect of spending the rest of their lives together. Obviously very much in love. They reminded me very much of myself and my wife, eight years ago last month, when we were the giddy ones, high on each other and oblivious of everything outside of ourselves.
Yet the difference is that both partners in this newlywed couple were gay men. Of ocurse that in no way made their love for each other any less real or valid than the love I feel for my wife. And as I watched another couple, two women, getting ready to say their vows, my mood turned from elation to heartbreak with the realization that this all may end Tuesday.
And I don't understand it. How can anyone be against love?
Because that's what it comes down to. You either support two people's right to make a formal and legal declaration of love and commitment to one another, or you do not. You are either for love, or against it. You either want everyone to enjoy the same fundamental civil rights, or you do not. That's the choice.
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetHappy anniversary! And great post Anil. You said many things that I've often wanted to say about marriage. The key, I think, to a great marriage is right there in your first point: be best friends.
~~~~~~~Yesterday, immediately after voting for Barack Obama at San Francisco City Hall, I walked upstairs and watched a just-married couple pose for pictures at various points around the rotunda. They were giddy and euphoric; obviously thrilled at the prospect of spending the rest of their lives together. Obviously very much in love. They reminded me very much of myself and my wife, eight years ago last month, when we were the giddy ones, high on each other and oblivious of everything outside of ourselves.
Yet the difference is that both partners in this newlywed couple were gay men. Of course that in no way made their love for each other any less real or valid than the love I feel for my wife. And as I watched another couple, two women, getting ready to say their vows, my mood turned from elation to heartbreak with the realization that this all may end Tuesday.
And I don't understand it. How can anyone be against love?
Because that's what it comes down to. You either support two people's right to make a formal and legal declaration of love and commitment to one another, or you do not. You are either for love, or against it. You either want everyone to enjoy the same fundamental civil rights, or you do not. That's the choice.
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetThank you so much for this post, Anil. If I ever end up writing "Offbeat Wife," I'm absolutely quoting you.
I get so frustrated by people who let marriage define them (ie "Ball 'n' Chain," stereotypical gender roles) without realizing that each of us has the freedom to define our own marriages.
After our wedding four years ago, I got really irked by how, every time I went out without my husband, people would gasp and say "WHERE IS HE?" I was like "People, we are spouses -- not conjoined twins." We still have our separate lives and interests and friends.
Too often, people blame the concept of marriage for their own distorted views of relationship dynamics.
I could go on and on and on ... but for now I'll just say AMEN BRUVVA. And congratulations.
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetHappy Anniversary!
We got married recently and so far I totally agree with marriage being fun : - )
If it is as well written as this article I would enjoy hearing about "What they never told me about having children"
Andrea
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | Tweethappy anniversary!
and this is the best post ever, btw.
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetPuh-lease! While much of the technical detail of your article may be correct, you certainly haven't shown any intent to incite violence. In fact, its irresponsible to suggest that intent on Palin's part. I don't believe you really think she wants someone to assasinate Obama. You appear to want someone out there to believe that, perhaps so they might take preemptive action of their own.
The techniques you describe are common in the professional politician's skillset. So, the selective criticism of Palin indicates a specific bias that effectively invalidates your argument for anyone that doesn't share that same bias.
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetHappy Anniversary!
The marriage equality issue has been important to me for a long time. I've had friends who were in love but unable to live in the same country for more than a few months at a time because of discriminatory laws and one of my friends married his husband in Canada and is fighting for recognition back home in Australia.
But getting married has been what's really motivated me. It's awesome. I can't let that be denied to anyone. I'm not a US citizen, just a green card holder (thanks to my right to marry of course), so I can't vote or even donate money to a California proposition, so I'm volunteering: http://loic.livejournal.com/114961.html
Thanks for your support on this issue. It's the civil rights issue of our generation and we're going to win it. In 40 years it'll look as ridiculous as the miscegenation laws do now.
Ian
Reply | Original | Permalink | Share | TweetGreat article. I am south african and therefore have no real interest in this issue, but the subtle manipulation of this behaviour has been very well described.
